6 TBSP cocoa, 1/4 C butter, 1 C sugar, 1/2 tsp vanilla, 1/3 C flour, 2 eggs, Cook 350 - 25 mins.



This blog is made into a family hard-cover book each year, so the moments that happen in our lives are often printed here...duh.

The personal ventures that I write about aren't all that fancy or fascinating so normally I don't get all worked up about throwing my words out into cyber land for all to see.  It's not usually a problem, but today it has become apparent that I have to start talking about my weight.

I'm a girl and that's just not the most fun subject to talk about in a public format, BUT since I do have a daughter and I am her role model, I shall write about my weight and do so willingly, though not happily.

Okay. Here goes.

"It takes a big dog to weigh a ton."  My dad says that when there's just nothing left to say.

When it comes to the subject of my weight, we've hit that point. There are no more excuses I suppose.  

I can only hide behind so many tables and stick my chin out in so many avoid the double many times.  Ya know?

I turned 41 last month...just an case it matters in the grand scheme of this post...which it does because it's good to note that we only live so long...and no longer.
But I digress...and ramble...

I used to be thin.  I used to be a size 8 jeans, medium top and 32 bra...with the cute little 2 pegs in the back. (Not the 4 and 5 prongs that I now get to enjoy)  Then I got married.  I did give my husband fair warning, mind you, that most of the women in my family gain a LOT of weight after they get married.  I warned him..and you know what he did, he married me anyway. Click here to read about it...

It doesn't help matters that I have this sort-of backward body morphing thing that happens to me when I look in the mirror. I really like what I see. I look in the mirror and think I'm looking quite hot-snot... But, when I see pictures of myself I'm thinking, "Who is that woman and why is she in the picture I was smiling for?"

Even when I look at the scale I just don't get it.  I look down and think, wow, I weigh a lot, but it doesn't click in my head that I Look like THAT weight.  I just don't get it.  But...on May 24th, I found out something very interesting. I found out that I weigh so much that my Cardiologist felt the need to say these words to me...

"We'll double your Verapamil, not for your arrhythmia but for the high blood pressure you've developed. If it's not down in 2 weeks we'll add Enalapril. You'll take these for the rest of your life, unless you do something CRAZY like lose 110 pounds or something, which ISN'T going to happen so, here's your script"

He said these words as a matter of fact.  He wasn't harsh or mean.  As his words came floating through the air to my ears, they felt oddly like a little fact of the universe that was just being stated as such...though I felt a twinge of challenge in my spirit. I felt a sudden urgency to prove that fact incorrect.

As I left his office, with my new prescription, I had to ask myself, "Did he minor in Psychology?" hmmm.... Shall I prove him wrong or go on living like this for spite because of his words?

Oh yes, people...I am THAT messed up.

So, life kept on twirling by and I didn't do much in the way of losing weight.

Yesterday I went to a local park and met up with a friend that I hadn't seen in a few months. Her name is Shelly too.  She came walking into the park and I thought..who in the world is that?  She had lost 60 pounds using Weight Watchers!

Then my friend, Stacy, came waltzing up and sat down next to us.  I was telling Shelly that I have to lose weight due to my health...even though I'm fabulously sexy just like I am...tee hee... and lo-and-behold if Stacy didn't JUST join Weight Watchers before coming over to the park!

Is that God or what?!  Yes you atheists out WAS God. Just sayin'

Well, today I joined Weight Watchers. Yes, I did it. I joined the monthly pass thingy at the office. I will be going to meetings, weighing in and I even bought the dog-gone points calculator to help me stay on track.

I started looking through the information and found out that I can have all the fruit I want. YAY ME!! Blueberries and Strawberries here I come... well...I've already been there today a lot and I still have points left to eat.  I'm supposed to eat all the points each day so I better get into the kitchen and whip up something yummy.

I'll try to find a weight tracker widget to put on the blog.  My goal is to get off of my Blood Pressure medicines.  I'll always have to take my arrhythmia meds, but I don't want or need high blood pressure. So, Here we go! Wish me luck.


Jen@Scrapingirl said...

Way to go!!! Let me know when you wanna go walking at the park. We'll walk the track while these crazy people play in the middle. :)

The Mom with Brownies said...

Walking in the park...I'll have to start slow and work my way up to Jen speed, but we can do it! :o)

Thank you!