In hindsight, I should have asked about your family history, your illnesses, weaknesses and warts. I should have gotten to know you better before putting my heart into your hands, but I was weak. I wanted the joy. I hot glued those rose colored glasses to my face and jumped in with both feet. You had me hook, line and sinker.
What you did not tell me was that you are a big fat liar! You have a way of lining the most joyful days of my life with just enough emotional chaos to bomb the dickens out of my emotional psyche.
As we prepared for Kazz's wedding, you delivered news that one of our children have to take medication for the rest of his life. You overshadowed the happy, fun wedding plans with illness and heartache that only a mother can understand. An ache that YOU KNEW would be with me forever. I will never be able to fully forget you because of that news...YOU ROTTEN, ROTTEN SACK OF STUFF.
THAT wasn't enough for you, though WAS it?! With Kazz's wedding you also delivered mounds of snow that made the drive more treacherous than driving on a glacier at the South Pole! Sure, all the guests arrived unscathed and returned home in one piece, but not with any help from YOU!
Jaibrian's adoption did come and go as you promised, but not without a heart wrenching scene where her birth parents signed off their rights in sobbing tears, hugging Brian and me while we physically held them up and bawled with them right there in the courthouse. And you KNOW the other crap that came along with that day...No...I'm not going into it. You know and that's all I'm saying about it! You stupid, stupid 2011!
Oh and SURE we became Catholic surrounded by wonderful friends who held us up in their prayers, mentored us, showed us love and became God-Parents to our children....okay...you did deliver THAT promise, and then some, but I'm convinced to this day that God over-ruled your attempts to sabotage that one!
And THAT was JUST the first few months!! Then you sent a house-fire to our friends who live right down the road from us, almost KILLING their 4 year old son. As we helped them during their time of need you put a screw into my son's finger!
Then my Grandma Frye passed away, my Aunt Judy passed away and my side of the family was in emotional turmoil trying to rally from funeral after funeral. My dad was sad, my cousins were sad, two of my cousins got divorced and some of my friends found out that THEIR kids have illnesses that will last a lifetime! COME ON!!
By August I was such an emotional wreck that I just wanted to sleep! This is when I knew you really didn't have a heart at all. I put the kids in private school and began preparing Brise for college. I started to feel better...and I think you knew that so YOU GAVE KOLE HIVES and broke my daughter's arm!!
That was it. I decided to live the holidays without you! I pretended you weren't even here. I didn't answer your calls, I turned off my phone actually, and I didn't answer the door when you knocked. I got out of my freaking bed, celebrated Thanksgiving with my family, The Twins' Birthday, Brian's Birthday and Christmas with my family ....all of it without you! It Felt Great! I didn't even sign a check during that time because you didn't exist and I couldn't write the date! HA!
I'm breaking up with you. We had a good run, but I've found somebody new. 2012 has promised me a trip to Disney World, a more organized home, a loss of at least 50 pounds and many nights at Tim Horton's for Mom's Night Out. You just cannot compete with 2012. He's a real charmer and you're a half-truth-teller.
No, no, nooo...it's over. Don't even try to come crawling back. I'm done with you. You're not the 2011 you presented yourself to be and that's not my fault. Look! Just deal with it. Good-Bye.
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