UPDATE 2011: We adopted another child from foster care. It's A Girl!! Jaibrian (JAY-bree-an)
We Love You, Jai-bird!
How much does it cost to adopt a child?
The total cost of adoption varies depending upon a number of factors such as the type of adoption, the agency through which you work, the state in which you reside, attorney fees and whether travel is required.
Range of Adoption Costs
Foster Care Adoptions $0 - $2,500
(Rates for other options further down in the text)
(Rates for other options further down in the text)
When becoming a foster parent, you are ALLOWED to ask for only infants. You get to choose the age, race, and sex of the children you want to parent. Yes, You can have an infant in your home within 6 months to a year if you REALLY want to be a parent.
We paid absolutely nothing to adopt our children. We've adopted three children who were in our care as foster children. We paid $250 (two-hundred fifty dollars) per child and was reimbursed those funds after the adoption was final.
Foster parenting is not only the cheapest route to take toward adoption, it is the most practical. It gives the parents a chance to "rent to own." Yes, that sounds vulgar, however, there ARE children who will not attach with certain parents and there ARE parents who have trouble bonding with specific children. It is important to understand that fact.
Foster Parenting gives the child and the parents time to build a relationship, test the waters and connect before committing to a permanent, life-long family relationship.
I've heard many adults say that they could "never" be foster parents because they would not want to give the children back. The cold, hard truth is that adults can handle it, so if you are one who says this...I respectfully ask you to...well....suck it up. YOU can handle it.
We, as adults, can choose to take children into our home, love them, care for them and share our home with them. We can choose to do so all the while knowing that our journey is so much easier than the journey our foster children are traveling.We can choose when to stop being foster parents. They cannot choose when to stop being foster-children. They did NOT get to choose this. If the children can go through it unwillingly and without their blessing, we, as adults, can certainly share our love willingly and let them into our hearts for a season.
We can handle it because we have all the power...YOU have all the power. You can handle giving a child back and you can do something so strong and powerful with your life that you will no longer ask why you were put on this earth. You CAN do it!
If you even think you MAYBE, kinda, could think about foster parenting, please, check out your local DHS Foster Parenting Classes. Just commit to taking the classes. You don't HAVE to be a foster parent just because you took the classes. They are FREE and a wealth of information.If, after taking the classes, you decide that fostering is not for you, then there has been no harm, but if you decide that you are brave enough to try it, there will be life-long pride for you and your family for doing so.
Licensed Private Agency Adoptions $5,000 - $40,000+
Independent Adoptions $8,000 - $40,000+
Intercountry Adoptions $7,000 - $30,000 (Source)
I know a family who adopted infants from Russia. They were beautiful boys. They were not brothers but were adopted by one family. After the first few years it became apparent that there was something very wrong with the children. This family paid tens of thousands of dollars to adopt the kids and then went through horrific agony trying to fix their children only to find that they are "unfixable."
They have life-long disabilities that will cost tens of thousands for the family to deal with throughout their entire lives.
They have life-long disabilities that will cost tens of thousands for the family to deal with throughout their entire lives.
Not only did the family pay to adopt, they now have NO recourse of action. Those children are their responsibility and they cannot get financial help anywhere.
If this were to happen to a family who adopted from foster care they would have a wealth of resources available. The Foster Care system has policies in place to help families deal with future situations that could arise. Adoptive families are offered help for the children. They will even pay the foster/adoptive parents money, monthly to help with extra costs of helping and raising the children.
Foster Care is a valid choice for finding a forever family.Parents, there WILL be children you know for a season but when God hands you the child that is meant to be yours for a lifetime, you will know that the road to finding them was one worth traveling.
Ready to take the first step? Click here
Ready to take the first step? Click here
7 comments:
I will be bookmarking this one. Wonderfully said Shelly. You really do need to write a book someday. :)
okay, so i'm totally sold on your site just from this one post - hard to explain why - just suffice it to say that this post really touched and stirred something within me - wishing i could reach out and give you a virtual hug!
jenn
Beautifully written. We have adopted twice through a private agency, one that thankfully is not very expensive, but have decided if we are ever in a position to adopt again it would most likely be through foster care. Right now we know we don't have the space for another child (based on the sq ft requirements).
Thank you. I felt led to write it. I just have such a passion for foster families and children who need loving parents. I was just hoping to put one more stepping stone out there for someone who may be deciding if this is the path for them. :o)
This is a great post, Shelly! With the impending new addition to our family I find myself thinking on occasion whether or not God has intentions of blessing us with more than one unexpected special delivery. It's great to have you as a resource!
I just want to point out that the wait can be long when adopting from foster care and usually the foster parent gets percedence over "adopt only" families and sometimes finalizing an adoption can take a few years. It is also a lot harder for military families. My husband and I have tried to adopt from foster care for 4 years and needless to say we have no children. I wish everyone luck on adopting from foster care. After our latest issues that we've had with the foster care system, my husband and i will be adopting internationally.
Mrs Spangelo,
I understand your unique situation. Being a military family you are probably not able to be foster parents. I am guessing that you move too much to be licensed for foster care?
My post is about asking people to consider foster parenting so that children who come up for adoption will be able to be adopted by their foster family. You are correct in your understanding that Foster Parents have the first priority when choosing to adopt their foster child. There are good reasons for this.
The child has been living in their home for a year or so and has attached to the parents and the family.
The family has bonded with the child and created a familiar, loving environment for the child.
The Foster Family has "first dibs" on adopting their foster child because it is the least traumatic for the child in question. If the foster family cannot adopt, then the children would be passed around yet again causing more harm to them psychologically.
It is true; If you are trying to adopt from Foster Care WITHOUT becoming a foster parent, it could take many years to get a child, however, if you become a foster parent, you get to be a PARENT right away and eventually keep the children who come up for adoption.
For those of us who want to be parents, as adults, we can handle allowing some of the children to go back home because in the long run, God will place our "forever child(ren" in our arms in His timing. And that, is worth waiting for...while we give of ourselves to children in need while we wait.
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